Women who have returned to dating after a divorce do not always announce the moment they start enjoying it again. Sometimes it shows up in the second-date detail: the color she normally saves for birthdays, the earrings that came out of a drawer, the jacket she almost left behind.

A message that notices the choice works better than flattery sprayed across her whole appearance. “That blue was unfair” can feel cheap. “You changed into those earrings after work, didn’t you?” sounds like he caught a private decision.

It also gives her a story to tell. Maybe her sister urged her to wear them. Maybe the group chat voted. Either way, she is not answering an opener; she is answering a moment where she felt seen.